quote

"Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,
but that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.


Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.


And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."

250705

numbskull that i am, i've managed to go and lose my phone again. for the third time. this year alone.

the way things are goin, it seems like i lose a phone every 2 months or so. by september, i prolly should have lost yet another one, if averages are anything to go by. there goes yet another sum of money.

rubbish the desire of that little black pouch.
perish the thought of that air max.
stop the craving for that new balance.

running on bad knees is a ultra gargantuan pain in the ass. plain bloody frustating disgusting thing to do. found out the hard way a few days ago. thanks in part to the constant goading of worm that i was just plain lazy and using the reason of resting my knees as a lame excuse, and my own want to stay in a somewhat reasonable shape, i laced on my free SAF issued new balances and got downstairs to the all too familiar carpark.

u go along in a more pronounced manner, slightly different from the normal, more efficient, easier gait to try and soften the impact. less then halfway into the ride, u already start to feel it. u go slower, not because you are winded, but because ur starting to feel your joints, which is never a good thing. u grind your way through, and by the time you are done, they feel like they've been baked. u feel like a slowpoke, and a more than a little fed up with urself.

hopefully i'll be able to make a better representation of myself in the game tomorrow.

i've still not taken to writing down how i feel, despite my bloggin since... well quite some time ago.
as a result, my entries' contents are roughly distributed in this manner:

60% incoherent rambling
30% disjointed ranting
10% crazy raving

pardon me.

last dance

food sucked, but the videos played were damn fine if u ask me.

wished i was a part of the east timor UN peacekeeping efforts.

taufik popped by

mr howlian aka Kaida tryin to look the part

i shall decline to put up my version up and be the laughing stock of everyone.

fat guys are good to put arms around.

so long huey

went for the UH1H drawdown dinner last tuesday, at the expense of the game.

we lost again, if anyone wants to know.

back to the dinner. seemed like anyone who had the remotest of links/encounters with the Huey were there; the hall was positively teeming with air force regulars.

food wasn't that great. dimwit that i am, i only realised that some of our ppl might be posted to some other workplaces in a matter of days. gonna miss some of them.

a video of the UH's past exploits was played. cable car rescue in 83, new world hotel collapse, and most recently the east timor peacekeepin efforts. kinda wished that i was among the ppl in east timor. either as a technician, or more so if i was one of the troops. ha, here i am, actually sayin i wished i was a army soldier...

knock knock

who's there?

noone.

did a spot of shoppin yesterday alone in town. got a few tees, a cap. now where can i find some paper bags?

the fat truck's rollin on empty, with its creaky wheels.

there's this squadron dinner coming up later, gather its gonna be a big thingy, wat with like a few hundred ppl attending. pity the poor waiters. and of course im ill-prepared for it, dun have a long-sleeved shirt to my name.

and because of this dinner, im gonna miss the game. after that embarrassing loss last time out, i was realy, for lack of a better word, pissed. been thinkin abt the next game, absolutely raring to go. was hoping i could turn in a better game, and WIN. gripes.

Lance Armstrong is somewhere out there right now on some french mountain pass, riding like mad. attempting to create history by winnin the Tour de France for the 7th consecutive time.
u go, dude!

sure hope he wins it. not that i know anythin abt road riding, but Lance is one hell of a guy.
contracted testicular cancer, which i learnt, after flippin thru his autobiography, had spread to his brain, and some other parts.

had surgery to remove one of his family jewels, forgot which one tho. and more on his brain.
lost 9kg (i think) in the process, and came back stronger. i cant even begin to imagine the stuff he went through to get back into shape, and to win the tour at that. a tour which is regarded as the most gruelling ride of all.

and apparently he had some help from genetics. seems like he was born with the ability to commute almost twice as much oxygen along his blood than most athletes, and lactic acid forms at a lesser rate den most.

admire this spirit and resolve in him. i reckon it takes alot out of a person to just even recover from cancer, and seeing wat he did just makes it all the more unbelievable. think he's like a beacon of hope to those stricken with the disease.

GO GO GO!

100705

sunday, and here i am yet again.
same old crew room, same old guard duty.
im already supposed to be a bloody lao jiao.
not that it matters that much, since eng and co cant make it for hoops.

july 10 happens to be my birthday.
im 22 as of now. dun feel any taller tho.

still 174 goin on 180.
still as clueless.
still as fat.
still as bum as i ever can be.

hopefully i'll be a nicer guy.

only dan remembered it.
prolly the only worthy thing he did since sec 1 lol.

i bet yk knew too, tho he didn't do anything.
dun realy need to, seein how we've been mates since like pri 1.

ha the little few else knew cos well, i told them.

i share my birthday with jessica simpson too.

and then and then and then

hoho the subaru is finally back, this time with new improved 26% black tinted windows.

found myself yammering abit past few days, at least for my standards. not realy verbal diarrhea, but erm, more prattle den im used to. dun realy know how to put it across in words properly. and mostly to people i dun even realy know. seems like i ramble on and on like a great big spool unravelling itself at times, and then zip up for indefinite periods. oh maybe im more comfortable with ppl talkin, but when they aren't, i generally make like a clown to get them started? hmm write so much liao still dunno wat im talkin abt. ha oh well.

the knees aren't feelin realy right. while the dull ache in the left knee is more or less, always there, the right one's always felt right as rain. not so since last week though. rested my legs since monday, they are feelin a tad betta now.

no carpark runs for a week. no output, same input. end result, fat.

hoopla? hoop lah!

i've just got myself into this amateur basketball league.
while its realy nothin much to crow about, im just that little bit happy for myself.
prolly the only bright spark past 2 weeks.
nvm, airheads shouldn't mope too much.

came across the little publicity for it in the papers, got to the webby, plugged myself, and by some dumb stroke of luck got called by a team.

always felt that i could hold my own against these swaggering CC players who walk like they own the bloody world, and 99% of which get in only by means of connections. of course, there are the realy nice, humble dudes who can wallop me 9 days out of ten, nothing against them.

1st game, real bad case of nerves i suppose. dragged worm along with me, in the hope that he can ball with me, but he flatout refused. opponents weren't that good; i messed it up all by myself. made 1/2 shots for a grand total of 2 points. turned the ball over 5 bloody f**** times. 1 measly assist. crap. we won eventually, so it didn't hurt that bad. final score was like 27-24. haha real low, but then again, the clock just keeps goin on and on and on, during throw-ins, free throws and whatnot. and wat with free throws taking up like a min or 2, actual game time was a pittance.

2nd game. our center, who used to be a semi-pro, and who was the main reason we won the 1st game, grabbed my shoulders and shook me like u would a pepper shaker before the game. "Leong, dun be so kan cheong!" dunno if he had any effect, tho i did have a betta game. the opponents were the team that blew out their opponents 68-28, and were totally made up of caucasians, including this 2.1m center.

got 9 points on 4/6, 1 frm 3 pt. got it in as the whistle blew end of 1st quarter, and there were actualy a few stray spectators cheering. felt weird. a few rebounds, and a bad call. how can it ever be called a block, when in the process u crashed headlong into me? we ended up on the floor, and all we got was an inbound? piang, just cos he's a few heads taller than me doesn't mean that its an automatic block.

we were actualy pretty close, till they started their full court press. our guards couldn't bring the ball up, and turned it over 5 consecutive times. the blowout started then. final score 61-20. bloody embarrassing, if u ask me.

i've been known to be a sore loser at times, cursing when i lose, face all cross. reckoned my face was pretty ugly when we lined up for the handshakes after the last whistle.

bits and pieces

it wasn't a particularly long life that mr Adidas T-mac 3.5 led. it was in fact a startling short existence as the ballin kicks for a certain under-tall, overweight forward wannabe. throughout the 3-4 months that it was around, it wasn't exactly a spectacular-performin pair either.

i've always eschewed the swoosh for the 3 stripes despite it being generally betta stuff most of the time, on grounds that adidas has proven to be more durable, while not laggin too far behind on the performance front.
im just a playground hoopster; i'd live with lesser cushioning if it could last that month longer.

T-mac 3.5 proved to be a major disappointment. its two predecessors were way betta. worn a bloody hole right thru the outsole in 3.5 months, and all it did was made me stick colorful plasters that i'd filched frm my sis and ma on my toes due to the skinning the toebox provided. garnered a few comments of acting cute.

im gonna revert back to the swoosh for a while now, since both aren't that durable anyway. im being a tad biased here, cos while its 80% of nike's hoops shoes that die prematurely, its only 1 out of like 5 adidases that share the same fate, but let me vent a little will ya?

for all of their R&D, cant they come up with a durable rubber compound for the outsole? or maybe its all a ploy to make us poor NSmen to cough up cash for a new pair every few months or so.

im gonna cough up blood anytime now. pui.